2016 has been a year of serious growth for me, especially in the sexual arena. I’m not a fan of New Year’s Resolutions because I think they set us up for failure and a mentality that only makes growth, expansion and true change seem like a quick fix. Our hopes of losing 20 lbs, having hotter sex or finding deep, real love typically begin to fade away once the champagne bubbles have settled in our glasses.
That’s why I opt for a theme for each year and to go into it with an orgasmic mindset devoted to opening and expanding in all areas. I’m still currently feeling into the theme for 2017, but the words that keep coming to mind for me are Classy Erotic…hmm..
I love having an overview of my year and reviewing it to see not only what I accomplished, but how deeply I loved, opened myself to new experiences and allowed myself to lean into the erotic pulse of life.
How orgasmic was my body AND life? This is where expansion and growth come in.
There were a lot of common themes I noticed surfacing in my most impactful growth experiences. That doesn’t mean that growth only came from “big” experiences, by the way. I’m a huge advocate for finding the sacred in the mundane and growing regardless of how impactful the situation truly was.
What were the themes I noticed? Maybe these came up for you too.
Themes like trust, safety and permission.
Boundaries, expectations and needs being communicated and met.
Feeling and EMBODYING all emotions — especially rage, grief and rapture.
Asking for what I want and allowing myself to receive.
Honoring the masculine and feminine, in myself especially.
In honor of putting 2016 to bed and escorting the fresh new year of 2017 in, I thought I would share a review of the top moments where I expanded myself sexually this year. I hope this inspires you to review your 2016 and see where you expanded yourself sexually too.
TOOK A SEX COURSE
I started off 2016 enrolling in an online sex course with my boyfriend at the time. I wanted to heal even deeper sexually with him and learn how to really open and trust my full range of love and pleasure. I had no idea that doing this would unleash so much for me in the relationship and sex realm, but it did. I learned a lot about the importance of communication, safety and trust in order to fully open and become even more orgasmic, not just by myself, but with a man too.
EXPERIENCED MY FIRST (OF MANY) ORGASMS DURING INTERCOURSE
I also experienced my first orgasm during intercourse. I’ll admit this was such a huge block for me for years. I could orgasm from penetration all by myself using one of my crystal pleasure wands or jade egg, but when it came (or lack thereof) to allowing orgasm to happen with a partner, it was never in the cards.
Until I learned how to trust and feel safe in my own sexuality, which then trickled over into the relationship I shared with a man. It was beautiful and I continue to experience orgasms during penetration, whether alone or partnered, to this day.
HAD MY FIRST (OF MANY) CERVICAL ORGASM
I learned about the power of my cervix and the heart and pussy connection. I remember having my first cervical orgasm on a full moon after having the most magical day ever. It took me about 45 minutes of opening myself and being consistent with my obsidian crystal dildo, but once I surrendered to my orgasm, she came in waves of deep ecstasy that filled my entire pelvis. It was so amazing that I was shaking from head to toe (in a good way) afterwards for a half hour.
I created a video on how to have a cervical orgasm because I want every woman to learn how to fully surrender to the depth, power and beauty of cervical orgasms. They’re life changing.
BEGAN TALKING MORE OPENLY ABOUT SEX ON YOUTUBE
I’ve been diving deep into sensuality and sexuality for the past few years both personally and professionally, but it wasn’t until this year that I finally decided to stop hiding behind my old facade and begin sharing my passion for all things related to sexuality and eroticism.
I had been playing safe behind my sensuality mask, but I knew there was a deeper, darker and way more erotic side of me that longed to emerge — and emerge she did with passion, pleasure and orgasmic devotion. I became more devoted to providing regular weekly content on sex, orgasms and self-pleasure/masturbation on YouTube.
I started out on my channel the year before sharing random things about sensuality, femininity and a few musings on sexuality, but it was always from a very timid space. Now you’ll find me talking about things like anal sex, secretly masturbating in public and the art of self-pussy massage.
INTERVIEWED 7 AMAZING WOMEN ON MY PODCAST ABOUT SEXUALITY
I had the absolute pleasure of engaging in rich, sexy conversations with seven intelligent, erotic and sensual women on the topics of self-love, pleasure, sexuality and more. We covered things like sacred dance, polyamory, the jade egg, Tantric sex and sexy self care.
I explored topics that called to my heart (and pussy) with women who were liberating themselves sexually in their own ways. They shared musings with me on what the erotic truly is for them, what it’s like to work in a BDSM dungeon, how they used a jade egg to manifest love and so much more.
Want to hear these intimate conversations? Listen below.
STARTED SELLING THE JADE EGG & CREATED MY JADE EGG ONLINE COURSE
I fell in love with the jade egg practice a couple of years ago and have been devoted to it as a weekly (at least 2-3 times per week) practice. In early May on a retreat in San Francisco surrounded by the power of other feminine entrepreneurs, I decided that I wanted to start selling the jade egg. That night on the full moon I did a ritual with two women who were staying in the same magical Airbnb as me and by candlelight I declared that not only would I begin to sell them, but I’d also create my own jade egg course for women to access online and get the healing benefits of a regular jade egg practice.
Two weeks later I received my first batch of beautiful dark green genuine Nephrite jade eggs from my wholesale seller and in July I launched the first round of my online course the Jade Awakening Salon.
The course has been a huge learning experience for me along with selling a physical product. Mailing out jade eggs every week lights me up and helps me to ground back into why I do what I do and why I’m so passionate about the jade egg.
Jade Awakening is now changing into Jade Egg Sexual Mastery, which feels much more mature and sexy and less esoteric. It’s also going through a huge upgrade with the content and I’ll be unveiling the new version when I open doors again in February 2017. Want on the list? Download a free copy of my Jade Egg Sexual Mastery ebook and you’ll stay in the know.
MASTURBATED & HAD A REAL LIVE ORGASM ON A PODCAST
I was interviewed by The King of Verbal Seduction, Alan Roger Currie, on his radio show The Erotic Conversationalist where I not only dropped knowledge about sexuality, releasing shame and the jade egg but engaged in podcast phone sex, masturbated for everyone to hear and finished it off with a real live orgasm. Oh yes…I went there.
It forced me to really face my sexual shadows and slut shaming fears, allowing me to reflect on how much I judge and shame myself sexually. It inspired me to put slut shaming, especially towards myself, away for good. Want to hear this provocative podcast episode for yourself? Listen to my alter ego “Ms. Amber Leitz” here.
EXPERIENCED A 2-HOUR LONG ORGASM
Yes I had an orgasm that lasted for 2 hours in waves upon waves of pleasure and orgasmic sensations rippling through my whole body, from head to toe. It opened me up to how we truly are orgasmic as women. That we ARE our orgasm. It’s not just about a quick climax in the genitals, but about how open we are to BEING our orgasm in body and life.
EXPERIENCED ORGASM WHILE WALKING ON THE BEACH
There was also the time this summer where I went for a walk on the beach of Lake Michigan after a thunderstorm and experienced orgasm not just in my feet, but in my whole body. Each inhale…each exhale an orgasm in itself.
I never thought I had particularly orgasmic feet (little did I know!) until that day, but it was a magical experience that changed my perspective of orgasm for good — that orgasm is a path and a way of being, living and embodying waves of pleasure and orgasmic sensations in each moment.
SELF PLEASURED FOR OVER 30 DAYS IN A ROW
This past summer after going through a rough break up I decided to devote myself to becoming the best lover I ever had and finding even deeper self love through this rupture in my heart. I self pleasured at least once per day for over 30 days. I lost count eventually…but it helped me heal and trust my pleasure even more.
STARTED SHARING EROTIC DANCE VIDEOS ON INSTAGRAM
Sensual movement and erotic dance are a normal part of my daily life and I decided to showcase it for everyone to see on Instagram. I hope to inspire women (you included) to unleash the power of your hips, ass and pussy through erotic movement that stirs up your sexual energy and sensuality.
REACHED OVER 4,000 LISTENS WITHIN 72 HOURS ON THIS PODCAST EPISODE
I recorded my podcast episode the Most Dangerous Form of Slut Shaming and it reached well over 4,000 listens within 72 hours. I was in total awe and filled with gratitude.
RECLAIMED THE WORD PUSSY
I started out my sexual journey using more educational terms like vulva and vagina and then transitioned into the sacred Sanskrit word Yoni, but none of those ever turned me on when it came to describing my beautiful sexual anatomy. That was until I gave myself permission to use the word that I secretly used in conversation anyway…PUSSY.
I was delighted reading the book Pussy: A Reclamation by Regena Thomashauer and felt even more aligned with my decision to reclaim this truly sacred word.
LEARNED HOW TO EXTEND AND EXPAND MY CLITORAL ORGASM INTO A WHOLE BODY ORGASM
Through explorative self pleasure and different orgasmic techniques I learned how to spread my sexual energy from beyond my genitals into my whole body and experience extended and expanded clitoral orgasms that radiated through my whole body — not just a quick “genital sneeze” that used to leave me feeling depleted, but now left me rejuvenated and juicy.
More on this coming soon…
WENT DEEPER INTO SEXUAL SHADOW WORK
I spent a lot of this year, especially fall, in a deep dance with my sexual shadow archetype — my inner shadow seductress. I made love to her, fucked her and danced with her down the path to ecstasy. We can all benefit from facing and loving our darkness and shadows, especially through sexual shadow archetype work.
BEGAN USING MY PLEASURE, SEXUAL ENERGY & ORGASM TO MANIFEST THROUGH SEX MAGIC
I realized that all of the juicy, erotic energy inside of me that literally has the potential to create a human life can also create MY life. I started getting clarity on my desires, big and small, and using the powers of being a sensual, erotic woman to manifest through orgasm and bring those things into the real world while having a great, orgasmic time.
I got in touch with my inner sex witch and began practicing solo sex magic, especially through my 30 day self pleasure adventure. I even used my sexual energy and orgasm to create a program designed to help women do the same thing with their own pleasure, sexual energy and orgasm called Manifest Through Orgasm.
I’m now in the second round of teaching this class!
HELD A LIVE CLASS LEADING WOMEN THROUGH A SELF-LOVE ORGASM RITUAL
I created a complimentary class online earlier this year leading the women who joined through a self pleasure ritual designed to help them release shame, access their sexual energy and find deep self love through their orgasm. It was a new experience for me, but it primed me to express more publicly about sex, self pleasure and orgasm.
DANCED FOR 4 HOURS IN LINGERIE IN A NYC CLUB SURROUNDED BY TURNED ON WOMEN
In November I traveled to NYC for the first time to attend Regena Thomashauer’s Womanly Arts Experience Intro event. This entire experience was amazing, mind-blowing and heart-opening. I catwalked or rather slutdanced my way across a “runway” on stage.
I saw women of all shapes, sizes, ethnicities and backgrounds coming together in turn on to heal. I witnessed the power of sensuality, pussy and sexual energy transform women living in victimhood to fully owning and embracing their pussies. It was raw and real. I danced through rage, grief, sorrow and owned my erotic innocence and sacred slut.
After the event I walked 30 minutes through NYC at night to a hot dance club where I proceeded to dance wildly and ecstatically in lingerie amongst the women attending the event for four hours. It was so healing for all of us. There were women dancing on the bar, reclaiming their erotic power. There were women surrounded by their sisters when they felt unsafe in a man’s presence. There were women going topless and other women celebrating them.
GAVE MYSELF PERMISSION TO HONOR MY SEXUAL CYCLES
If there’s one thing I’ve learned about being a woman is that we have cycles within cycles within cycles. Sexuality is so much more than the act of sex. It’s everything that life stems from and it’s the sexual energy inside of us — our creativity and juicy life-force.
There are days when I want to self pleasure or have sex and days when I don’t. I used to be really hard on myself thinking there was something wrong with me if I didn’t behave like a total “sex goddess” every day and want sex or self pleasure all day long every day. Giving myself permission to honor my own arousal patterns and sexual cycles has been incredibly liberating. There is no one way or right way for a woman to be when it comes to her sexuality.
Those are the 19 ways in which I’ve expanded myself sexually in 2016. I’m more than ready to see what sexual magic will unfold for me in 2017 and I hope you’re looking forward to that for yourself.
Comment below and tell me:
- What is one experience you had in 2016 that allowed you to expand sexually?
- What are you most looking forward to in 2017 when it comes to your sexuality?
Happy New Year, lover!